At the right time, another acting guru came into my scopes. I read and re-read Michael Chekhov's To the Actor fifty years ago. This book was published in 1954, the year before Chekhov died. He'd been a major force of the first half of the 20th century in the American theater. Today I'd like to reflect on what Anton's nephew Mikhail Aleksandrovich Chekhov, better known stateside as Michael, taught my impressionable, eager-to-learn self. I knew that I couldn't really learn much about acting just from reading about it, so I was dedicated to trying and re-trying every exercise Chekhov offered.
As I've indicated elsewhere, the aspects of acting that require careful observation and spot-on imitation came naturally to me. What I was hungry to delve into was the "magic" of an actor portraying a person with complete immersion and ongoing conviction. Sentences like these really got me fired up:
"Under the hypnotic power of modern materialism, actors are even inclined to neglect the boundary which must separate everyday life from that of the stage. They strive instead to bring life-as-it-is onto the stage, and by doing so become ordinary photographers rather than artists. They are perilously prone to forget that the real task of the creative artist is not merely to copy the outer appearance of life but to interpret life in all its facets and profoundness, to show what is behind the phenomena of life, to let the spectator look beyond life's surfaces and meanings."
"Imagine that within your chest there is a center from which flows the actual impulses for all your movements. Think of this imaginary center as a source of inner activity and power within your body."
We start with molding the space. "Like a sculptor, I mold the space surrounding me. In the air around me I leave forms which appear to be chiseled by the movement of my body."
I started to realize that I could practice this molding at any time. Chekhov reminds us that movement and gestures come from the entire body, not just the face and the hands and arms. By starting each molding gesture from the center in my chest, I felt my physical presence grow stronger, more assured.
On to floating through space. We imagine that the air around us is like the surface of a pool. Our movements "merge gently and beautifully one into another." Feeling supported by the space around me felt like finding a different kind of power, this time coming to rather than from my center. He writes, "A sensation of calm, poise and psychological warmth will be your reward."
Then, with vivid imagery, we attempt and then learn that interplay between inner and outer as we commence in flying. Chekhov's suggestion that we not only make whole-body flying movements through space, but just as important, that we "may come to a static position outwardly, but inwardly you must continue your feeling of still soaring aloft." I still remember quite vividly my practicing flying, first with my body, and then (especially if I was, say, waiting for the bus) inwardly. Right now, dear reader, go inward and imagine that you're flying. Really feel it. Isn't that great?!? "A sensation of joyful lightness and easiness will permeate your entire body.
Finally (at least for today), we practice radiating. Even before a movement commences, send rays out from your body in the direction of the movement. Just as important, after the movement (of walking, sitting, waving, etc.) is completed, allow the radiating to continue after the physical gesture has stopped.
More Bear manna here: "You must not be disturbed by doubts as to whether you are actually radiating or whether you are only imagining that you are. If you sincerely and convincingly imagine that you are sending out rays, the imagination will gradually and faithfully lead you to the real and actual process of radiating."
As always, Chekhov concludes this exercise in radiating with sharing some of the positive outcomes from mastering this approach: "A sensation of the actual existence and significance of your inner being will be the result of this exercise."
Now sharing this with you, I feel I'm seeing myself through fifty action-packed years. I see myself eagerly, earnestly developing a character, this one not for the stage, but for getting through adolescence. The specialness of my "secret powers" lived in me in approximately the same secret spot where my gay identity hung out. Looking back at 14-year-old me, I feel tenderness of a boy looking to become a man.